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August 11, 20222 min read

Morning Wake-Up

When Israel left the slavery of Egypt they walked for many years in the dessert. In Exodus, the Bible says that God led them the long way to go avoid going through cities they would have to conquer because he knew they weren’t ready for war. God provided for their every need with dew on the ground in the mornings and manna for them to eat.

But in Numbers, we see that they have started grumbling about eating the same thing every day. They no longer see it as a blessing, and they start remembering the good food they had in Egypt. They say that it was free, but they are forgetting that it was not free. It came at the cost of being enslaved to the Egyptians.

This story is similar to leaving an abusive relationship. Many times God tries to protect us by taking us on a longer journey that doesn’t involve fighting wars when we are weak. He wants to give us time to rest, recoup, and heal. He provides for us along the way with resources and tools for healing.

But many times we focus on the struggle. We see that we are living in an apartment when we used to have a house. We see that we are working our butts off when we used to be at home with our kids. We begin to remember the good times with our abuser. And we think maybe I should just go back. At least when I was there I wasn’t alone. At least when I was there I could be at home with my kids.

It’s important at these times to remember. Remember the trauma that we have been through. Remember the bad things they have done to us. Remember the reasons why we left.

You see we can’t block out the bad memories. The bad memories are necessary to remind us of what we have come from. And to prevent us from going back!

Blocking the bad memories in an attempt to fast forward the healing actually prevents the healing and often leads to repeated patterns of abuse.

Instead, remember everything: the good, the bad, the terrifying, and allow God to heal you as you remember. Allow the memories. Allow the feelings. Allow the healing.

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Misty Knight

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